Maybe Introverts who Hate Phone Calls and Don’t Have Time For Email Updates Shouldn’t Quit Facebook After All

So, (awkward chuckle), you know how I wrote this post on quitting Facebook? Yeaaa…about that. Well, my plan seemed like a good one and I really do think it’s ideal to keep up with people in more personal ways, like phone conversations, meetups or emails/letters. But I don’t really have or want to spend my time updating a few people via email with pictures and notes about my life. I practically fear phone conversations (so why I thought I could commit to regular ones…I don’t know). And I’m kinda busy for frequent meetups. Ah who am I kidding? In the four months I was off of facebook, I didn’t meet up with anyone who I’d hope to catch up with. So my experiment with having more personal relationships just doesn’t work very well for a busy introvert like me. I’m back on Facebook. I do at least have a renewed sense of purpose on it. Since I’d permanently deleted my account, I’m starting over with a clean slate and I hope to keep my friends’ list to people who I actually consider a friend (even if we’ve only met through blogging). Also, after reading that Narcissism book, I am keenly aware of how I present myself. I don’t want to be all like “look at my life and admire me”. I hope to be as real as I can be rather than showing some glossed over representation of my life. And I don’t want to be an attention-grabber or even to care who “likes” things on my page. I just want to share things that I think people who are close to me can appreciate. When I left Facebook, a few people were almost upset with me because they wanted to follow me and my family’s life since we don’t live near one another. Facebook seems to be the easiest medium for me to share pictures and updates, so there ya have it. The other side of the coin for Facebook usage. It’s both a blessing and a curse.

Why I Deleted My Facebook Account

Yep.  I did it.  I took the plunge and deleted my Facebook account after being a member since 2005.  That was way back when it was just for college students.  It’s been almost a daily part of my life for the past 8 years.  But you know what?  I haven’t regretted it or missed it these past few weeks.  It’s quite freeing.

From what I can tell, many people have a troubled relationship with Facebook.  On the one hand, you have all these people (some of which are friends) that you’re connected with and can easily share/receive information with, but on the other hand they tend to drive you crazy at times.  Facebook is ever-evolving and it’s gotten to the point where it was too distracting, frustrating and annoying for me.  People are always sharing links, some of which I found interesting, some of which I found infuriating.  I’d tell myself I would get on Facebook for a couple minutes, but then the shared links would catch my eye and I’d end up on it for much longer.  Clearly a fault of my own, but I’m glad the temptation is gone.  Also, I think people are more opinionated and louder on Facebook than they are in real life.  Jen says here that people who don’t have Facebook tend to view their friends more positively.  I can understand that for the same reasons she talks about.

I plan on keeping in better touch with people than I was when connected with them through Facebook.  It is too easy to have shallow friendships with people in which maybe you keep up with their life by reading their posts, but you don’t actually have face to face or phone to phone conversations.  As was mentioned in a talk at the New York Encounter (that I attended this past weekend), “the bonds of society are getting weaker”.  We’re less attached to one another.  Face to face encounters build relationship rather than passively keeping up with someone’s life (or what they feel like posting about their life) through the internet.  And if I think of someone and it’s been a while since I’ve seen them, it’s a reminder than I should call them to get together.

So yes, I’m excitedly trying to simplify my life, but I admit, it’s hard not to just switch out Facebook with some other online addiction, like keeping up with multiple bloggers.  But if I get this under control, I’ll be one step closer to freedom.  Freedom from the grasp of the internet.

 

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If sarcasm and self deprecating humour were an Olympic event I'd definitely qualify.

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